Organization - Asking What's Working Well?

If you've been following my posts for awhile, then you may know that I've been battling this same problem for years now: the papers on the dining room table.

You see, we have an 8 person table, and usually 4-5 people eating, so I'm able to use one end for the mail. And it piles up, and around, and occasionally down...as paper clutter will do.

So yesterday a question popped into my head. "What is working well?"

So I made a list:

The supplies drawer of the file cabinet is great. Need a spiral book? Pretty computer paper for a letter? A composition book? There they are, all bought on sale.

I love my little three drawer plastic organizer unit, one drawer labeled "Write", the next "Calculate and Label", and the next, "Cut and Fasten". By using verbs, I was able to include a whole lot of stuff with only one or two-word labels. Eliminates questions such as, "Mom, where's the tape?"

The wall calendar has all the family appointments posted, and I use my purse calendar in conjunction with it.

My daily to-do lists are written in a simple 8 1/2 X 11 spiral notebook.

We can find local numbers in the Rolodex, and older contact information in the "Addresses Notebook"...a simple binder with notebook paper and typed sheets.

The shredder and the hole punch and scissors are all readily accessible, close to my place at the table.

My online bill paying is under control and on time.

With streamlined ease, I can plan meals, make a grocery list, and find recipes.

I use composition books to plan, to journal, or to keep track of information I glean while on a trip.

I'm able able to grab my Neo (portable word processor), or one of my zipper binders, as I'm going out the door.

So, with all that working so well, what's the problem???

The mail! Bulletins from church. Fliers from the apartment management. Any papers that come into the house. Oh, don't worry. If you have ever sent me a card or letter, I joyously read it before it ever hit the table. But the rest? Not so good. I stack it to sort later. And later rarely comes. Sometimes it all ends up in a box because we're having company and we need another place or two at the table.

So what can I do?

Hmm, well, I have notebooks for medical bills and EOB's (explanation of benefits)...I just need to put the papers in there. I could put bulletins and flyers in my Household Notebook. I could make a thin notebook for bills that have to be paid by mail. Not all that much really needs to be changed...only two major things. I simply need a time and a place.

Perhaps I just need to pick a day of the week to process mail...and a place to stack or sort it in the meantime. I kept thinking I needed a desk with enough space to sit at it. No, I only need a desk or system for the mail, not for myself. I already love my place at the table, where I can look out the window...and I can bring one category of mail to my place at a time and process it.

This project suddenly appears do-able...all because I started with the question: What is working well?

How about you? Have you ever tackled a difficult project by asking what's already working well?

What I Learned in 2011

Doesn't the word "twenty-twelve" have a nice sound to it? Not only that, 2011 had some sadnesses in it that I wish had never happened. However, I also learned some things in 2011 and I would like to share them with you as slogans.

Before I begin, let me tell those who might balk at my first slogan - about guilt - that yes, I believe in sin. But "feeling" guilty is only good for true sin and then only as a temporary thing to get us to be sorry and make amends. Feeling guilty for things from our past life, or for things other people did or are doing, things we can't help...you get the picture...all of those are a futile waste of energy and only contribute to the landfill of the human condition.

For those who know me well, you will realize that some of these slogans are only a work in progress, not a "done deal". But that I "discovered" them is a start...not that I discovered all of them on my own. One or more of them I learned from a friend and so I post this today in honor of all that was good and true and noble in that friendship.

What I Learned in the Year 2011:

1. Give up the guilt.

2. It's good to be happy.

3. I am not responsible for the happiness of anyone else.

4. My happiness is not dependent on that of others.

5. It is good to serve others; it is not necessarily good to please others.

6. Be decisive.

Verse for a Broken Friendship

I wrote this free verse about a broken friendship, just the day before my sister died. I didn't post it, because I wanted to see if the friendship could be restored. To the credit of my friend, she did send me condolences on my loss, in spite of our rift. But as of tonight, it looks like she considers the friendship irreparable...or did she ever even consider it a friendship?

I share this in case anyone else is suffering, or has suffered, something similar, and in case it helps you to know that you're not the only one. Yes, broken friendship is a grief, too.

WHERE DOES IT GO?

The pain grips my heart.
Sometimes I feel it beating like a drum.
Friendship rent in two.
Oh, what did we do?

Where does it go?
Where does friendship go when it disappears?

Does it go into the sea?
Does it go up like a balloon?
Does it settle like dust upon the moon?
Or on a stair? Does it go anywhere?

Where does it go?
Where does friendship go when it disappears?

Is it still in the heart, breaking it apart?
Does it flutter against the bars like a caged bird?
Where, oh, where does it go?
Where does friendship go - when it disappears?

 

Note Added in February 2012: I want to share with you an article I just discovered, written by Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen, entitled, How to Let Go of Someone You Love- Letting Go of the Past.

Christmas Following a Death in the Family

Wait, don’t go away; it’s not all gloomy. Yes, my sister died early this December...totally unexpected, it was. As I said on Facebook, I am sad but not depressed. I’m not sure how to explain that. I cry sometimes. I wish I could pick up the phone. Something is missing from my very heart. But I am not surrounded by darkness. I don’t understand why my sister had to go away so suddenly; it doesn’t seem to make any sense. But life never does make sense, does it, really? As my seat neighbor on the flight to Boise said, “Embrace the moment”. I’ve been trying to learn that for ever so long, and I usually fail. Maybe now I will learn.

At the same time, I have no regrets. Chris and I embraced every moment we spent together. We worked together when my mom died, when my step-father died, when my dad had a stroke. We talked together on the phone every week in the past decade. We talked about our families, our jobs, our projects at home, some of our struggles and disappointments, and our dreams. Wherever we went with the conversation, she tried to be sure we brought it to a positive or optimistic conclusion before we got off the phone.

Chris was interested in everything you did, if you wished to share it. I went to Chicago with my husband on a business trip last fall. When we arrived, I let her know. She texted back, “About 5 min’s ago I told Jim that u guys were prob just about at Chicago. I guess I was right. Have fun!” How many people are that interested, and that selfless, to know right down to five minutes when you will arrive somewhere...on a pleasure trip, when she couldn't afford a pleasure trip?

Christmas was her favorite holiday, her favorite season. She put herself into giving joy to others all year long, but particularly at Christmas time. So, what would she want us to do...with Christmas right around the corner from her passing? I think she would want us to do what we’re doing: to decorate the tree; to make the good foods; and to wish every one of you a very Happy Christmas!